It’s Monday…

It’s Monday. And in true Monday fashion, I’m stuck on a song lyric so I figured I’d post it for everyone.

“What Doesn’t Kill You (Stronger)” by Kelly ClarksonYou know the bed feels warmer
Sleeping here alone
You know I dream in color
And do the things I want

You think you got the best of me
Think you’ve had the last laugh
Bet you think that everything good is gone
Think you left me broken down
Think that I’d come running back
Baby you don’t know me, cause you’re dead wrong

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn’t mean I’m lonely when I’m alone
What doesn’t kill you makes a fighter
Footsteps even lighter
Doesn’t mean I’m over cause you’re gone

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, stronger
Just me, myself and I
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn’t mean I’m lonely when I’m alone

You heard that I was starting over with someone new
They told you I was moving on, over you

You didn’t think that I’d come back
I’d come back swinging
You try to break me, but you see

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn’t mean I’m lonely when I’m alone
What doesn’t kill you makes a fighter
Footsteps even lighter
Doesn’t mean I’m over cause you’re gone

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, stronger
Just me, myself and I
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn’t mean I’m lonely when I’m alone

Thanks to you I got a new thing started
Thanks to you I’m not the broken-hearted
Thanks to you I’m finally thinking about me
You know in the end the day you left was just my beginning
In the end…

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn’t mean I’m lonely when I’m alone
What doesn’t kill you makes a fighter
Footsteps even lighter
Doesn’t mean I’m over cause you’re gone

[2x]
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, stronger
Just me, myself and I
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn’t mean I’m lonely when I’m alone

It’s also a bonus that I just paid for my concert tickets to see her and The Fray in Kansas City in September with a group of girlfriends. The boys kindly decided they didn’t want to go 🙂

I’m in the process of downloading a bunch of music from the bands I saw at Rockfest this weekend (http://www.rockfest.com/). Most of them I liked, and would love to have to run to.

It’s funny how I want music that’s pretty angry while I run which is the way that I un-wind and relax. It also helps me think. Somehow letting myself be angry and out of control while I run – make my lungs burn, feet hurt, legs whine – but still be productive allows me to re-frame my perspective on the world. It lets me deal. Which is part of the reason I’ve had a hard couple of weeks I think. The doc told me no running or jumping since I had a stress fracture in my foot.

I got the all clear Friday afternoon but I’ve been nervous to try to run again. It’s weird since it’s all I want to do but I’m nervous that now I won’t be able to go as far or as fast (or slow) as I used to. I know I just have to start somewhere. It all starts with putting on my new shoes and walking out the door. My mind could definitely use it. Maybe tonight. Maybe tomorrow at run club (which I haven’t been to in 3 weeks).

I haven’t been real public with this information but there’s a guy in KC that I really like. He proved this weekend that he’s not worth my thoughts since I didn’t cross his mind while he walked directly past my apartment building on his way to the bars with some friends. It sounds so stupid to say it out loud but I’m so bad at dating and knowing who to let myself be close to. I’d must rather just be close to everyone and be trusting. But then I feel this way afterwards. Thanks to those who continue to be my friends and continue to listen to me get upset by things that I shouldn’t have let bother me in the first place. I really appreciate it.

That decides it. I’m running tonight. Need to run him out of my mind.

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